A Field Guide to Windbags

obama hotair
image: Politizoid
    • Habitats:
      • Academia
      • Government
      • High-tech industry
    • Markings:
      • Males prefer blue suit and rep tie
      • Females favor business suits (Lovely plumage!)
    • Calls:
      • known as corpspeak, polspeak, or techspeak, depending upon the habitat
        • “This paradigm maps into the corporate space.”
        • “We utilize best practice methodologies to build a roadmap for change.”
        • “It is incumbent upon . . .”
        • “The solution is comprised of . . .”
        • “Going forward, we deliver value-added synergies” (or “synergistic value adds”). Choose one.
        • “We’re driven by our value proposition narrative.”
      • The windbag will often join these calls together into long meaningless songs.
woopie guy
photo: Rudolf Schmidt
    • Behavior:
      • Incapable of creating or repairing anything technical. Could not repair anything if his or her life depended on it. Nevertheless, windbags regularly make pronouncements on technical matters.
      • No technical skills, knowledge, or experience, yet often “manages” people with technical skills — an amazing feat equivalent to conversing in Lithuanian without knowing the Lithuanian language.
      • The last person you’d want to depend on in a system emergency
    • Camouflage:
      • Hides within herds
      • MBA (preferred by business sub-species)
      • Law degree (governmental sub-species)
obama windbag
image: Politizoid
  • Notable windbags:
    • Al Gore
    • B Obama
    • B Clinton
    • H Clinton
    • S Ballmer

Visit my website: http://russbellew.com
© Russ Bellew · Fort Lauderdale, Florida, USA · phone 954 873-4695

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